I wrote so many texts about being different, but I never seem to get it right. Today, „be different“ is a marketing slogan for all of those who don’t want to be different at all. Just stand out a tiny little bit, never really and never too much, because if you are too different you become just weird and nobody wants to be weird. Except me. Weiterlesen
Crazy is a pretty relative term, isn’t it? There are things that I see as completely crazy while everyone else seems to think they are perfectly normal. Like being completely content in existing within marked-out parameters, never questioning anything about why they are there in the first place. Weiterlesen
I keep telling myself that it’s going to be okay. Someday it will all be okay. One day I will be like them and find a way to grow into someone I can like. Someone that someone else might like. The problem is that words are so easy but oh so empty if you don’t really believe them, and I really don’t. Weiterlesen
Have you ever noticed how it seems like everyone is constantly complaining about something? It doesn’t matter what you talk about, there is always something that’s just not right. Something that keeps us from our happiness. Weiterlesen
What if all you are is never enough? There is all you could have, if you could just be someone different. Someone smarter. Someone tougher. Someone braver. Someone with more discipline. Someone smaller. Someone thinner. Someone who matters. Because all I feel doesn’t matter, not to anyone but me. Weiterlesen
Life is complicated. Life is messy. And more often than not, it is also utterly frustrating. Because life always goes on. No matter how much you mess up, no matter how much the past haunts and no matter how much you regret everything you didn’t do. Until it doesn’t. And then it is too late to change. Weiterlesen
In my head, I have already written you a whole book, telling you in a very passive-aggressive way how much I really don’t miss you. And another one in which I tell you, how much I do miss you. How much I wish everything could be different and we could still be friends. But that’s not how life works. At least not mine. Weiterlesen
You don’t know me. And if you did, you wouldn’t want to. Because I’m not someone people like. I’m the one they talk about once I’m away. I’m the bad example, the pathetic one. The one that everybody just leaves behind. That’s all the voice inside my head keeps telling me. And that voice makes it so easy to believe. Weiterlesen
Es gab mal eine Zeit in der ich mir wünschte, ich könnte diejenige sein die du willst. Die du brauchst. Aber je besser ich dich kennenlernte desto offensichtlicher wurde, dass ich beides niemals sein würde. Was ich damals nicht begriff: Du bist ebenfalls nicht der, den ich wollte oder brauchte – und du wirst es auch niemals sein. Du warst lediglich eine weitere Lektion die ich nicht lernen wollte.
>>> ENGLISH VERSION BELOW
Besser. Das Wort vor dem es mir am meisten graut. Besser. Die eine Sache die jeder von mir möchte. Ich soll mich besser fühlen. Bessere Entscheidungen treffen. Besser sein. Doch es sieht aus, als wäre „besser“ die eine Sache, die ich absolut nicht sein kann.
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