Last week I read in a magazine about the benefits of being single. You know stuff like “You don’t have to deal with stupid nicknames or smelly breath in the morning”. My first thought was: Oh my god, are you fucking serious? I think she was.
My first problem with this article was though: Why do people who don’t have a relationship constantly feel the need to justify the fact that they don’t have a partner? It’s like all those vegans trying to make life without meat, eggs, fish and milk sound worth living. I disagree but I don’t care what anyone does or doesn’t want to eat.
And I don’t care about being single either. I know exactly why I’m not in a relationship and why that probably isn’t going to chance any time soon. Sometimes I’m quite okay with those reasons and sometimes not so much. But in order to change my situation I’d have to make some changes in my life I’m not really ready to make right now.
So if people feel the need to pity me for being single they can do that. And if they envy my so-called freedom of not having to deal with relationship-problems they can suit themselves. Maybe I should offer them the pieces of my broken heart, then the might reconsider the envy.
Relationships aren’t just flowers and rainbows – nothing in life ever is. Being single can be hard and it can be liberating – it all depends on the day you ask me about it. But I’m rather alone then lonely with someone I don’t want.
So why is it that we always feel the need to explain ourselves to others? What does it ever really change? I am where I stand right now because of the choices I made. I’m shy, awkward and weird and most people can’t deal with that. And in turn I don’t want to deal with most people anyway.
I’m not looking for any approval as long as I can look in the mirror without any regrets. It’s me who has to live with the choices I made and be happy with the changes. Nobody else lives my life but me. And so I am alone, I’m single – and that’s just the way I want it right now.